run hot and cold

Meaning

To alternate between being very interested, friendly, or affectionate, and being distant, cold, or unresponsive. This phrase describes someone who sends mixed signals and is emotionally inconsistent.

Examples

• I can't figure him out; one day he's texting me constantly, and the next he runs hot and cold.

  I can't figure him out; one day he's texting me constantly, and the next he runs hot and cold.

• She's been running hot and cold lately, which makes me feel very insecure.

  She's been running hot and cold lately, which makes me feel very insecure.

• Stop running hot and cold with her; either you like her or you don't.

  Stop running hot and cold with her; either you like her or you don't.

• Their relationship is exhausting because they both run hot and cold all the time.

  Their relationship is exhausting because they both run hot and cold all the time.

• I decided to walk away because I was tired of him running hot and cold.

  I decided to walk away because I was tired of him running hot and cold.

Common Mistakes

• ✗ She runs warm and cold.

  ✓ She runs hot and cold.

  The idiom is fixed and must use 'hot', not 'warm'.

• ✗ He is running hot and cold to me.

  ✓ He is running hot and cold with me.

  Use the preposition 'with' when specifying the person who is experiencing the inconsistent behavior.

Related Expressions

Practice

• I'm tired of how you ___; I need some consistency.

  💡 Alternate between affectionate and distant.

  Show answer

  run hot and cold

• She keeps ___ with her feelings, and it's driving me crazy.

  💡 Present participle form of the idiom.

  Show answer

  running hot and cold